Wednesday, February 11, 2009

More Manslations

Q: Why don't some women get hit on all the time?

One of several possibilities, according to the Manslator:

"She’s not attractive, and he’s only interested in looks. Actually, this is not as big a deal as we think it is. A really attractive woman gets hit on more than an unattractive one, sure. But you know what she doesn’t get? More high quality hits. She’s just going to get more of les baggage du douche."

Depending on what year it is/where I work/the amount of solar activity, I might be in the "getting hit on all the freaking time" group or the "totally ignored - well, not ignored, but not approached, like, at all" group. Based on my experience, I completely agree with the above excerpt!

Disclaimer: I'm not suggesting that most of the guys who have hit on me are douches! I mean, they might be. I have no way of knowing. But I can tell you that sometimes it's REALLY obvious that a guy only wants what I ain't about to give him, and that puts him in the "low quality hit" category.

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Attention Boypeople: Do not do this

In an effort to help males assimilate into civilized society, I recommend noting the following:

"Good manners are, first of all, civilized behavior. That's as opposed to wild behavior. 'He acts like he was raised in a barnyard,' my mother would say, about some hapless boy who pulled up in front of my house for a date and just sat in the car and honked."

This act translates to: "Yo bitch, get your ass out here!" even if the thought behind the act is only: "OMG, your dad is scary, your parents will hate me, I don't know what to say to them, fearfearfear!" Either way, you are undesirable. Grow a pair and learn how to go on a date without being a douchebag or go home.

I should mention that I have never experienced this. The boys I dated all came to the door - that was when the trouble usually started (the trouble being only that they were... disappointing). They either didn't know how to talk to parents and grunted their way through conversations, or they THOUGHT they knew how and clearly saw themselves as very charming (which is not at all charming). Being nervous is completely okay and understandable. In fact, my mom would have reacted to a sincerely polite guy who was a bit nervous about making a good impression with "Aw, he was nervous. Good." He would get a "point" for being able to carry on a conversation reasonably well, and for not assuming he was in control of the situation (With my mom? Hahahaha! My mom is so slick in those situations and is very good at getting information out of people. Any guy who doesn't notice this gets labelled "doof").

And now I'm all grown up, but living at home... lame. So, the same rules sort of apply because honestly, I want to see if a guy passes the meeting the parents at the door test. While in a way I'm sorry to have to inflict a meeting the parents moment on a guy on a first or second date, the fact is, I am poor and live off the 'rents. That's life right now. If a guy can't engage in polite non-smarmy conversation with them, I don't want his lame ass.


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No money to buy them with, anyway

In the midst of this economic meltdown thingy, the fashion industry hopes we care about the newest old new thing. Seeing as how it may be difficult to persuade us to part with our money (even Americans' pending extra $13 a day, woooo:, this is not a wise move (click link and scroll down to "floppy trousers").

Do they sound like zoot suit pants to anyone else?

Ugh. No. Try again.